...I have decided to watch my Queer As Folk DVDs in the hope that they will inspire me. Hopefully watching will get me back on track to write my Brian the way I want to; to make him experience things that he didn't on the show, I want to explore his thoughts. That's one thing we never got to see on the show - we never knew what he was thinking or feeling (ya know cuz he doesn't do feelings) but there were times when you could see a hint of something behind those blue eyes. I've seen hurt, disappointment, curiosity, love and shame. But they never explored it. This is what I have been showing in my story. If I depart from my story plan now it will change all that and this will become a generic 'Brian Kinney fucks a lot and ends up with Justin' fic and I don't want that! I want to explore this man and get under his skin and touch his psyche. I want to know him.
The first season of QAF is so telling of what the writers wanted us to see and know about Brian; that he is selfish and likes to fuck. But c'mon there has to be more substance than just that. I will continue to delve beyond the shield that he puts up to discover the real Brian Kinney; what makes him who he is this Unapologetic Narcissist?
Come back to me my Muse.
Dazz
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