Divas? Not So Much.

So, Divas...I know that they are trying to move away from the 'so-called negative' connotation of this word...but guess what? Aretha Franklin? Original Diva! Donna Summer? Diva! Celine Dion? Diva! Mariah Carey? Diva! Whitney Houston? Diva! Bette Midler? Diva! Barbra Streisand? Diva! Mary J. Blige? Diva! Miley Fucking Cyrus??? Uh, how do I say this delicately...HELL NO! What was VH1 thinking? I could see Leona Lewis, Adele, Jennifer Hudson and Kelly Clarkson being at that level years from now as long as their careers have the longevity and success I think they will. Alicia Keys? Diva! (Where was she?) P!nk? Definite Diva! (Where the fuck was she VH1, did you not experience this chick's voice and performance at the VMAs?) It kills me that they would have Jordin Sparks who won American Idol and then was dropped by her record company on this show, but no P!ink! What.The.Fuck.

That said, the performances were okay, if I had to say I would pick JHud, Kelly and Adele as having the best performances. Bottom line there was no one on tonight's roster who qualifies as a Diva...yet.

To Paula Abdul, if this was the best gig that you could get after AI, then I kinda feel bad for you. Somehow, I'm hoping that them letting you go and hiring Ellen as your replacement is still a big fake-out publicity stunt and you will be back in the judge's chair for the AI season premiere.

To Cheryl Crowe, how the fuck do you let Miley Fucking Cyrus out-sing you on your own fucking song? Travesty, I am so unchecking your songs on my IPod.

By far the best performance of the night: Kelly Clarkson and Melissa Etheridge! Their voices together; fucking amazing!

If I had to put this show together here's what my line-up would be:

P!nk
Alicia Keys
Bette Midler
Melissa Etheridge
Syleena Johnson (Google her, this chick has a wicked voice! Check out her CD The Voice)
Toni Braxton (she's still got the pipes!)
Celine Dion
Mary J. Blige

Dazz