Monday, November 30, 2009

ABC- You & Me Are Fucking Done Professionally! UPDATE

You know I have to be really fucking upset if I'm quoting a line from the infamous Christian 'I Will Fucking Terminate You' Bale rant as a title for a blog post. Yes I AM FUCKING ANGRY!! Read on...

So ABC, according to you and your Disney Puppet Master, Chris Brown, a man who beat and bit the shit of his girlfriend, was charged with and plead guilty to FELONY assault, is more acceptable to appear on GMA than Adam Lambert. Adam Lambert whose only 'crime' was that he gave ABC the over the top, shock tv performance that they KNEW would draw viewers and give them the ratings they wanted.

You continue to let the world believe that Adam went all 'rogue' and did not tell ABC what his performance was going to be and therefore no one from ABC had okayed it or signed off on it. I CALL BULLSHIT!! After the Superbowl Nipplegate debacle, all tv stations kept an incredibly tight reign on their productions. especially live ones. Also, since Ryan Seacrest was the host he HAD to have known the type of provocative performance Adam was going to give. You have all hung this young man out to dry and it is reprehensible.

By canceling Adam and scheduling Chris, you now say to the world we prefer to have a convicted felon on our show than a homosexual.

...and for that ABC,YOU AND ME ARE FUCKING DONE PROFESSIONALLY!

You have lost this viewer that's for damn sure!

UPDATE!: The power of the Internet At Work!!! This just in from The New York Post's Page Six: Chris Brown will not be appearing/performing on ABC's GMA after all! ABC caved to the negative backlash it received regarding Adam Lambert's cancelation but allowing Chris a felon, to perform and promote his upcoming album on GMA.

Here's the link for the NYP P6 article.

He will now be appearing on ABC's 20/20 to give an in depth interview to tell the world why he beat the shit out of the woman he loved, but he still will NOT BE ALLOWED TO PERFORM!!!

Justice for Adam Lambert!

UPDATE: More fuckery; Adam's appearences on ABC's Jimmy Kimmell and the New Year's Rockin' Eve show have both been canceled. An ABC spokesperson said 'we decided not to move forward with the booking at this time'. Yeah, uh-huh, let me translate, 'The Rat wins and homophobia continues to spread across this country'.

Dazz

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Adam Lambert &The Double Standard

So let's talk about Adam Lambert.

I love him. He is fuck talented. He is unapologetic. He is sexy. He is blatant. He is charismatic. He is sexy as fuck.

I hate American Idol. I have hated that show since the year Chris Daughtry got voted off when he should have won. That was when I realized that the voters have no fucking idea what TRUE talent was and this whole competition was just a huge popularity contest a la High School. Going through High School once was more than enough for me, TYVM, so I was done with that show.

However, just like everybody else, I can't help but watch the first few episodes every season because that's where we get to see the turds (seriously, why do these peoples' friends and families lie to them and tell them they're talented and then let them go on TV to be ridiculed and shamed in front of the entire world???). Along with the turds we get to see some gems. It was clear from the first few epis that Adam Lambert was going to be a GEM.

Immediately, I was drawn to him. There is something about the way he moved, the way he spoke and the way he performed that was sexy as fuck! It was confidence. CONFIDENCE, not to be mistaken for ARROGANCE. He was comfortable with what he was singing and he was confident in his ability and talent. I was blown away. His voice is very melodic and his style has been described as theatrical and flamboyant. Bottom line is, he can sing and he is a helluva entertainer and a performer. I started voting for him from the beginning. On the performance nights I would be all itchy to hear what he was going to sing in each genre. There wasn't a night where I didn't enjoy his performance.

My absolute favorite of his performances was his version of Mad World. JFC, it gives me goosebumps now just thinking about it. In my Opinion his rendition of that song was hands down the BEST performance in the history of American Idol. If you don't know what I'm talking about, take a look and listen for yourself Adam Lambert-Mad World Live. If you want to hear the studio recording here it is Adam Lambert Mad World World Studio Recording.

There is no denying that he is talented. Night after night, I voted for him. My fingers were cramped from hitting the speed dial button, but I was determined to get as many votes in within that 2 hour window. My friends and I would watch his performances while on the phone with each other and then as soon as the show was over, we're all voting for Adam.

My friends and I are all different races, different sexual orientations, different taste in music, but we all recognized that Adam was the most talented singer and performer/entertainer of the season. What we loved about Adam was that he was different. I'm not talking sexuality, at least not yet. He was different, because he didn't deliver the safe, vanilla, expected performances that we've seen time and time again from other contestants. Every performance he gave was ADAM performing a song by Artist X. Not Adam trying to sound and perform like Artist X. If I wanted to hear a Whitney Houston rendition of a Whitney Houston song, I could go to my local bar and listen to a bunch of drunk ass chicks karaoke/sing that song from the Bodyguard. What Adam gave us was his interpretation of the song. He made you feel it. He made you connect to him, by his VOICE. I have NEVAH cried listening to someone perform a song on a reality show until the night Adam Lambert sang Mad World. Fucking Cried. I was speechless. At that point, I knew in my heart that he was going to win the competition.

Then all of the speculation and drama started. The 'reports' that he might be, GASP 'a homosexual'. My immediate thought was, uh yeah...AND???! I thought he was gay, but SO FUCKING WHAT?? My closest friends are gay and when we watched the show they were certain he was gay. It changed nothing for me or them. If anything, I think it made me even MORE determined to help him secure a win. Then we started looking online and the absolute hate directed towards him because of his alleged (at the time) homosexuality was heartbreaking. Let me tell you people, there is a lot more homophobia out there than we would like to think, believe or acknowledge. It was akin to racism; 'America is not ready for a Black President', 'The Middle America Soccer Mom set is not ready for a Gay American Idol'. It saddens and angers me as I write this when I remember all of the diatribe that was spouted. My gays were hurting, I was hurting, it sent one of our own who was on the precipice of coming out right back into the closet because of the negativity that the speculation about Adam's sexuality raised.

The things that were said...from 'God hates Fags' to 'He shouldn't be the American Idol winner because he would be a bad example to our young people'. Hooker say what??? The arguments I would get into with co-workers, colleagues, strangers, chat rooms...my responses ranged from 'God doesn't hate fags. How can he hate someone that he created in his image?' to 'If you have your kids looking to the winner of a singing contest as a role model then you are fucking idiot, Parent'. There was no getting through to or winning them over, though. One night I just decided that we were going to win this the only way that mattered; with our votes. So, we told everyone we knew to vote for Adam. We had people who didn't even watch AI voting. People took up the cause because they saw what was going on as a threat to a group's Civil Rights. The finale I lost count of how many times I voted...but the next day I woke up and my right hand was stuck in a claw and hurt like hell. Then the news; Adam didn't win. My immediate reaction was What.The.Fuck??? Then came anger...then I was just sad. Sad at the state this country is in. But then again, why should I be surprised? This is the same country that pulled out nearly all the stops to prevent a Black man from being elected as President. This is the same country where when I go certain places with my BF, or GF or friend who is of a different race we get 'the look'. This is the same country that feared electing a woman as President, because they still consider females the weaker and more emotional sex and therefore she shouldn't have the ability to 'press the button' ya know like when she has her period or is PMS'ing .

Then I thought about it and I realized that we had come full circle. The voting ceased to be about talent and it became about popularity and personal preference. It came down to a 'clean cut, married, simple Christian man' vs. A 'flaming, extravagant, flamboyant, theatrical homosexual'. If you think otherwise then you are fooling yourself. It shows that there are still a lot of hate-filled, intolerant, ignorant people out there. They voted overwhelmingly and Adam lost. All those people who were voting for that laughable Danny Glasses Guy...mobilized and threw their votes behind the Christian Man. Some people even said that it came down to race - Christian vs. Jew.

But I was fucking proud of Adam. He was true to HIMSELF and never presented himself as anything other than who or what he was. My close friends are gay and I know first hand how difficult it can be for them when they are outside 'the community'. One of them is very flamboyant...and celebrates and proclaims his 'GAYNESS' as he proudly calls it. Another is more low-key, but not any less gay. It's just that to exist in Corporate America where he makes his living he must 'blend'. Sad, but this is still the reality in 2009. I have been his Merkin for him at several of his work functions...sad but we all have to do what we have to do. He is not happy to do it, but he must work to provide for himself. It kills him to hide this part of himself. Yet another of my gays has a unique philosophy. These words are what I wrote for one of my stories after talking to him about his sexuality: "It wasn’t something that I hid, but it wasn’t something that I felt the need to announce; it was just who I was. I didn’t walk into a room and announce that I was left handed, but when you saw me writing you knew what I was. Same thing with my sexuality; I didn’t walk into a room and announce that I was a fag, but if you saw me fucking a man in a corner of that room then you knew what I was."

Adam chose not to let speculation and questions about his sexuality distract from his talent and him trying to win a singing competition. I think he was absolutely right not to address the gossip and speculation. To see the press digging for pictures of him kissing another man and holding it up to the Middle America Soccer Mom set as if to say 'voila, shame, see we told you he fucks men so he cannot be chosen as an American Idol' was sad and shameful. Seeing things like that shows us that we have not progressed as far as we'd like to think.

But I was secure in the knowledge that within a few months that no-one would even remember the name of the guy who won but they would always remember Adam Lambert. He was a sensational talent that was going to around for a long time. I was gonna support Adam with whatever he did. In me he had a fan for life.

If you've read my older posts you saw that I want him and Lady Gaga to go on tour together; two fucking phenomenally talented entertainers - what a helluva show that would be. Adam Lambert is going to be successful no matter what he does.

So all of this brings us to what's been going on these past few days. His performance at the AMA's was his big debut, the day before his album dropped and it was being touted as the performance of the night...and it was. It closed the show and as soon as it was over all hell broke loose. People were up in arms...he kissed a guy, he provocatively dragged a girl across the stage by her leg, he pulled at a chick's vag, he dragged 'sex slaves' across the stage by leashes, he thrust his cock (and what an impressive looking cock it appears to be) in some guy's face to simulate oral sex. Oh, the horror! Let's break it down here, my biggest peeve about his performance was that Adam was off vocally. I can only imagine the pressure that must have been on him from his Record Label, from his PR folks and from himself to hit it out of the park. Did he? No. It was just a good performance. Not the standard that we know he can deliver. (He even admitted it on his Twitter that he was pitchy and HELL YES I follow him) He was nervous, there was a lot of choreography to remember, cues to hit and HE FELL at one point (although he played that shit off so well, most people thought it was part of his act). I also think that he was nervous about the reaction from the audience as well. You can see from the audience reaction that they were stunned at what they had seen. Maybe that's why he gave em the finger? I mean, there were overtures of BDSM, D/s, Bondage, Goth, Bordello influences...in short Adam DID NOT DISAPPOINT! People, the fucking song was called 'For Your Entertainment'! In the words of Maximus Decimus Meridius, 'Were You Not Entertained?' I sure as hell was. Here are the words to the Chorus of the song:

Oooh, do you know what you got into?
Can you handle what I'm about to do?
Cause its about to get rough for you
I'm here for your entertainment
Oooh, I bet you thought that I was soft and sweet
You thought an angel swept ya off ya feet
Well I'm about to turn up the heat
I'm here for your entertainment


He delivered. The 'problem' was that a lot of people did not like his entertainment. To each his own. He was pitchy and screamy at times but no worse than other performers that night. At least he sang live and didn't lipsynch like others. I like campy and theatrical and over the top and I LOVE that Adam did it. If you've seen Adam's performances from back in the day you would have known what to expect and what he was capable of when he pulled out all of the stops. I wasn't shocked and I doubt that any other true fan of his was either. Go look at some of his older performances on YouTube and you'll see what I mean.

So then the hoopla began when ABC decided to edit out the simulated oral sex from its West Coast broadcast citing complaints that it received about indecency and that those complaining were urging the FCC to step in. JFC, it was like Nipplegate all over again. This time I hoped that the artist in this case would stand firm and not capitulate under pressure (I'm talking about you Justin Timberlake!) So far Adam has not capitulated and apologized. Here's what Adam told Rolling Stone magazine, "Female performers have been doing this for years — pushing the envelope about sexuality — and the minute a man does it, everybody freaks out. We're in 2009 — it's time to take risks, be a little more brave, time to open people's eyes and if it offends them, then maybe I'm not for them. My goal was not to piss people off, it was to promote freedom of expression and artistic freedom." I could not have said it better myself.

Here's the fallout:

Adam was supposed to perform on ABC's GMA the next morning, but the ABC brass canceled him. Why? Because Middle America can't handle some man on man kissing or a hint 'o BDSM in the morning with their coffee and as the kids enjoy their Cheerios. Official statement from ABC 'we were concerned about airing a similar concert so early in the morning'. Okay, I get it. This I can kinda understand. The performance he had given the prior night would not have been appropriate for early morning television. However, instead of speaking to Adam and compromising with him to remove the (what they deemed to be) 'objectionable' material or 'tone down' his performance, they outright canceled him! FAIL!

We know the real reason he was canceled. ABC is owned by Disney. Disney needs the Middle America Soccer Mom set to survive. They had to appease the 1500 Soccer Moms who complained the night before. If they had decided to let Adam perform on GMA, all hell would have broken loose and the Soccer Moms would all turn rabid and write letters of complaint about ABC AND Disney. There would have been threat of boycotts and people, the Mouse cannot afford to lose its biggest revenue earners - the Middle America Soccer Mom set!

Then, like a saving grace in steps CBS to the rescue. Adam performed on the CBS Early Show and he was phenomenal. I was happy, I felt vindicated. Look at this beautiful man and his fucking awesome voice. CBS had to have been crowing to themselves over the coup they had scored over ABC's shoddy handling of Adam. Here is a link to Adam's CBS Early Show Performance.

Then CBS shot it all to hell when they did their little intro prior to interviewing Adam. They showed the snippet from his AMA performance the night before and BLURRED out the part where he kissed his male keyboardist. Seconds later they showed the Britney/Madonna/Christina Aguilera kiss - UNBLURRED!! See below pic. Here folks is the point where it was so blatantly obvious that there is a DOUBLE STANDARD in terms of what is 'acceptable' and what is not. They later had the nerve (after their Double Standard was pointed out by angry fans and bloggers and via Twitter and various sites) to issue this bullshit, CYA statement "We gave this some real thought. The Madonna image is very familiar and has appeared countless times including many times on Morning television. The Adam Lambert image is a subject of great current controversy, has not been nearly as widely disseminated,and for all we know may still lead to legal consequences. I call BULLSHIT on you CBS.









Let's break it down:

ABC caved from the pressure of a few upset viewers and edited/censored Adam's performance when it rebroadcast it for the West Coast.

ABC caved from the potential backlash and canceled Adam's GMA performance due to the 'potential for a repeat of the previous night's performance which contained imagery some deemed indecent and objectionable'.

CBS crowed and invited Adam on to be interviewed and to perform. Adam performed well. Then CBS fucked it all to hell with their double standards.

The thing is with all of the controversy, Adam is getting a lot of publicity, more people are hearing him perform and that means more fans and more record sales. I am sure though, that he has also lost a lot of fans, fans that feel that he has betrayed them since this was not the image that they associated with him when he was on American Idol. They feel betrayed. Fuck that. Adam is Unapologetically and Blatantly living his truth as Adam Lambert.

ABC acted cowardly for caving on his GMA performance. They could have compromised and provided Adam with guidelines on the performance and I am sure even Adam would have agreed that what he had done in the prior night's performance would not have been appropriate for an early morning talk show. ABC, however, did not give Adam that chance, they just arbitrarily canceled him.

Disney are hypocrites! Their little darling Miley Cyrus performed on the 2009 Teen Choice Awards, dancing provocatively with older male dances sliding around her on the floor, gyrating her hips and touching herself on the inner thigh, while wearing a pair of 'coochie-cutter' shorts and with her bra exposed. Then they bring out an ice-cream cart with a pole on it which she promptly starts using to do some simulated 'tame' stripper moves. Really, people? No one saw anything wrong with that on a show directed at TEENS and TWEENS???

A lot of the arguments I heard were that Adam's performance was more suited to cable - MTV, VH1 or the like. Probably true, but it didn't happen that way for whatever reason. I for one would have been happy if he had performed at the MTV VMAs because then Adam, Pink and Lady GaGa would have been the top 3 BEST performances of the night.

I maintain that the blame for this entire brouhaha lies with ABC. Someone from ABC had to have been present at the rehearsal and seen what was going to go down. Somewhere ABC signed off on Adam's performance and gave their stamp of Approval and All Systems Go. They expect us to believe that Adam, his entire entourage, his Management, his PR people knew about this performance BUT nobody from ABC did? That Adam went 'rogue'? I call BULLSHIT!! ABC knew and they were on board cause they wanted the viewership and the resulting ratings that Adam would bring! It ain't called shock TV for nothin' people! They rolled the dice and lost and Adam was the fall guy for their loss.

Female popstars have been doing these over sexualized performances for years. Madonna, Janet Jackson and Britney Spears come to mind. The reason Adam's performance was such a controversy is because he is a gay man. If you replace Adam with either Britney, Janet or Madonna in that same performance, it would have been deemed 'edgy' and that these ladies are 'still pushing the envelope artistically'. See, the Middle America Soccer Mom set knows that Britney and Madonna are wives and mothers (that 'wholesome' image they can relate to) and recognize that they are acting and putting on a show to shock and entertain us. They sit in their living rooms and gasp 'oh, that Madonna is so edgy' as Madonna rams a guy's face into her crotch, kisses her male keyboardist and pulls at the crotch of a female dancer. Cue to Adam's performance and all they can think is that because he is a gay man that he is trying to ram his 'gayness' and what he does as a gay man (kissing, fellatio and crotch pulling?!) down their throats. They become incensed and irate and run to their telephones and call the decency councils and complain and then they call ABC and complain and then they fire off an angry email to the Disney Corp.: 'Dear Mickey Mouse, I was going to book a 10 day vacation to Disneyworld for my entire family (20 of us total) but after watching this disgusting and indecent display of depraved acts on the American Music Awards I do not think that I want to give my money to a company that supports this type of behavior.' You KNOW that's just what happened. So the Mouse caved and they made ABC cave.

People argued that their kids were watching and were exposed to these indecent acts. Uh, what the fuck were your kids doing up at 11p.m to watch this? Also, let's be honest these are the same people who are shocked when they find out that 13 year old Janey is pregnant or is wearing shag bands and when confronted admits that she doesn't have sex with boys, she only gives oral. Yep, totally fucking clueless! Seeing a man on man kiss at 11 p.m. on Network television is not going to warp your child's mind, or morally corrupt them or 'turn them gay'.

Bottom line is this: Adam you have fans out there who enjoy what you do and will support you. We love you for who and what you are and we think you are very talented, fuck hot and we love you! Continue to live your truth and please continue to entertain us.

Dazz

Happy Thanksgiving




Happy Turkey Day!

First off, let's just take a look at the pic of my turkey; fucking hilarious, non?

I hope you all have a great day.

I hope you enjoy good food, good alcohol (safely, please), good family (hey, you'll see them one more time for the year at Christmas and then you're free of them till next year, YAY!) and good friends.

I'm not gonna list all of the things that you should be thankful for, you know that better than anyone.

What I am gonna say is that if you're able to logon to this here Internets, fire up a PC (JFC or a Mac!) and read my thoughts on this here blog, then that means that you have a helluva lot to be thankful for. It means you have a place to live, it means that you probably have a job, it means that you have electricity and just stuff in general and that means that you are doing a helluva lot better than A LOT OF OTHER PEOPLE. So be thankful for that.

One of the things that I am most thankful for are my friends. You see, I'm not close to my family, but over the years, I have made some friends who I have come to consider family. It is a very diverse family; we're all different races, different ages, different sexual orientations, we have different tastes, but there is one common underlying thread that connect us all. WE FUCKING LOVE EACH OTHER UNCONDITIONALLY. We were lost ships floundering who all managed to find each other and now we are each others' family. For that I am truly thankful.

If you're drinking, please do NOT drive. If you're driving, please do NOT drink.

Our turkey has been dessimated and this year we ran out of white meat before dark meat (some of us are on a health kick this year and opted for the breast, FUCK THAT, I enjoyed my drumstick, TYVM!). The mashed potatoes were light and fluffy (and not that shit from the box either). All in all a good meal, accompanied by the laughter and loud boisterouness of my family.

Now, we're all stuffed and sleepy and most of us had to open our pants we ate so fucking MUCH!

We are happy and healthy and there is so MUCH FUCKING LOVE SURROUNDING ME, I COULD BURST.

Later, there will be dessert; pumpkin pie, apple pie, pecan pie and Chocolate Cake - All served a la mode (vanilla or pistachio are your choices of ice cream) but for now, we're just enjoying one another's company and basking in the love that we have for each other.

I hope you're having a great day too!

With LOVE,

Dazz

Monday, November 16, 2009

You Were Abducted - Of Course You Need Crepes

Yes my friends, the post title perfectly sums up the awesomeness that is Fringe!

Thoughts:

Walter's fascination with brains...uh yeah.

Astrid is not as squicked out about this Fringe stuff as she used to be.

Walter and Peter's Uterus-Noise Teddy Bear...say it with me...Awwwwww

Broyles goin' rogue and getting shot...that man is sexy and stoic. No CHJ this epi.

Nina - this bitch has the uncanny ability to switch emotional states like nobody's business. One minute she's gentle, encouraging and cajoling with Walter. The next she's cold and calculating when emailing 'Willem' about the collateral damage of one of their experiments or lying directly to the FBI agents' faces. She's lying to Broyles too, but I still say they're making the beast with two backs with aewsome CHJs!

BTW, we all know that they're not shutting down that 'Mind Control' experiment just because the kid with the Pez dispenser fucked up, made contact with his 'Mom' and killed a bunch a people.

Holy Fuck...how many 'Tylers' are there? It looked like at least 10 in the room where the doc was taking the sedated 'Tyler' at the end - I'm calling it the Hall O' Tylers!

I agree with walter...you were abducted...of course you need crepes!

Peter is fuckhawt!

Promo for next epi...There is more than one of everything???!!!! I can't fucking wait!

This fucking show pwns me!!!

Dazz

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Grrr Just Fucking Say 'Thank You!'

I started out as a reader of fanfiction and if I was really impressed by a story that I was reading I would take a few minutes to write a review to tell the author what I enjoyed. I just thought that since they had taken the time and spent the effort writing for me, that I could certainly spare a few minutes to let them know what I enjoyed about their offering. Sometimes it was a comment about how funny the character was, or that I agreed with a character's reaction to a plot point, sometimes it was just to acknowledge how well written the story was.

If I started reading a story and it wasn't my cup 'o tea, then I stopped reading and moved on to one that was. I do not flame authors because I may not agree with a plot point or character behaviour/development etc. I just move on. I know that sometimes I get pissed when reading and I so don't agree with the direction of the story. I yell at my laptop and assert 'Edward is being a fucking douche', 'Bella is a complete cunt!', 'Bella is being totes uber-stupid' or 'Jesus Christ if I read another story where DiNozzo gets kidnapped and raped I am gonna lose my fucking mind!', but I just walk away from those stories and take em off alert and find something that really catches my attention and is worthy of my time.

When I started writing and publishing my own shit I realized how completely awesome and awe-inspiring it it is to receive reviews. That made me feel even better for all those times when I had taken a few minutes to show other authors some love by writing a review. It is not easy taking that first step and publishing something that you created. You know that it won't be for everyone, but you hope that someone reading it will get where you were coming from and will care about the characters and the story in the same way you do and take the time to let you know. When I got my first review (it happened to be a positive, complimentary one) I hollered and cheered like a loon; I scared the shit out of the GF and the DD (Dear Dog). It felt good. We all as authors say that we do not need validation; that my friends is Bull to the shit! It's the validation from our readers that spurs us to get the next chappy written and uploaded rapidement!

When I receive a review, I always take a minute to reply to thank the reviewer - it is basic fucking courtesy! It is me expressing my appreciation for them taking the time to tell me that they enjoyed what I created. I have been very lucky that this gesture has led to back and forths between me and the reviewer that have led to some good friendships on the multiple sites dedicated to fanfiction with my DBTN nom de plume as well as other pen names I write under.

The one thing that I absolutely abhor is when an author does not take the time to reply to a review. Seriously, one of my fave fanfic authors came up with a brilliant way of handling the overwhelming number of reviews that he (he writes as a woman but he's really a guy and I love it that NO ONE has figured it out!) was getting. He dedicates one hour every night to answering reviews. He has a word document where he has canned responses already typed up and he copies and pastes a reply to a review. If it's one of those reviews that's 'Plz update soon...I loooooove this story!', he's got a reply that says simply, 'Update coming soon! :-) '. If it's a review saying that the reader enjoyed the chapter update, he's got one that says, 'Thanks so much for reading and reviewing, I'm happy that you are enjoying the story' - incidentally that is the one I came up with and use and he liked it so he totes plaged it! When it's a flame or a negative review then he's got one that says 'Thanks for taking the time for letting me know how you feel about my story.' Sometimes you get a review that is outside these scenarios and that's where he spends the time to actually free-form that response. Those are the ones that take the most time; the ones that you can tell the review put a lot of though and effort into the review.

I know that you're gonna say, well that's fine when you only receive a few reviews a day, what about those authors who received hundreds?'. That's a good point, then you go with the bucket response and Ctrl+P 'Thanks for the review!'. People will prefer this generic form letter type response than feeling as though their review was not even acknowledged.

I respect the authors who will come out in the A/N of the subsequent chapter and do a mass thank you to all who reviewed because they received hundreds of reviews and even though they tried to respond to as many as possible they couldn't reply to everybody. But the thing that gets me is the authors that DO NOT EVER RESPOND TO REVIEWS, BUT HAVE THE FUCKING AUDACITY TO BEG ME TO REVIEW THE CHAPTER!!!! Oh that fucking burns me when I see their little A/N at the bottom of the chapter...'reviews are love!' and begging me to review. Fuck You, I won't do it! Those authors do not deserve it! These are the same authors that spend ALL FUCKING DAY TWEETING INANELY WHEN THEY COULD BE USING THE TIME TO RESPOND TO REVIEWS! You know who I'm talking about! The same authors that HATE-TWEET WHEN THEY RECEIVE A LESS THAN PERFECT DEVOTIONAL REVIEW! Uggghhh....they make me burn with that shit.

They fail to realize that when you show your appreciation to a reviewer, that person will more than likely be more inclined to review subsequent chapters and stories; in short you get a reviewer for life.

I have a few authors that I follow religiously who I take the time to review their work because it's so fucking good! They always take the time to respond. It may not be the same day or the next, but I ALWAYS GET RESPONSES FROM THEM WITHIN THREE DAYS OF MY REVIEW. Basic fucking courtesy! They've got me; I'm a reviewer for life. I've got them on my Favorite Author List, their stories are favorited and alerted and hell yeah I have them on Author Alert too!

Over the last few months I have really become jaded by the blatant lack of courtesy in the fanfic world. The self-important, holier-than-thou and self-entitled attitudes are reprehensible and disgusting, but I chose to write at my own pace and only read the authors work who I truly enjoy.

I was searching through the NCIS archives and found some amazing stories from 2 to 3 years ago and I enjoyed them so much I reviewed them. The author responded a few days later thanking me for my review and said that she didn't even realize that people were still reading her stories and she thanked me for even taking the time to review, that it made her day. Ah, a symbiotic relationship - She created a story hoping that it would potentially be enjoyed by a reader. A reader enjoyed it and reviewed it to let the author know that it was a well written, thought provoking, funny etc. story. The author reads the review and is thrilled with the fact that a reader enjoyed her work. The author then responds to the review and tells the reader that they appreciated the review.

C'Mon folks, how fucking hard would it be to click on the reply url, type a few words (or Ctrl+P your canned response) and then hit submit? I can bet it's a helluva lot shorter than the time it took your reader to come up with that review that made you smile all day today.

Do the right thing authors; Just Fucking Say 'Thank You!'

Dazz